Is it self love or lack of self-esteem? Perhaps it’s just for validation?

Hi guys! Welcome back to my blog. It’s been nearly two years! 

I’m back with a topic I’ve had in mind for a while. Lord I actually need to be consistent this time! Sigh…I’m done with my master’s degree now so I really don’t have any excuse.

How’s everyone coping with the COVID-19 pandemic? I hope you’re all keeping safe and practising social distancing? My heart goes out to everyone that’s been affected one way or the other. Please continue to keep safe ❤️

As for me, I’ve been indoors working, Netflixing, eating, sleeping, taking pictures and doing some online courses (when I feel up to it). It’s such a struggle to stay motivated during this period but we just have to keep trying.


** I’m not a psychologist or some sort of expert so this is more of a discussion as this topic has been on my list for a while now and I mainly want to hear your thoughts on it. So please do leave a comment to let me know what you think. Don’t be shy…

I always come across explicit images of females on social media and commonly accompanied with the hashtag or caption “self-love”

So here’s my question…

Why do we feel the need to upload explicit images of ourselves on social media in order to express self-love? 

Can we not have self-love without necessarily associating it with an explicit picture or is it really more about having low self-esteem or seeking validation from others?

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s absolutely up to each individual whether they wish to upload an explicit image or not but my question is based around the reason behind it and the caption or hashtag used; especially “self-love”. I see this caption being used a lot with images I personally believe are not relatable. 

Does this mean self- love is only about physical appearance?

For example, me taking a picture in a bikini is simply just a picture in a bikini. The picture wasn’t specifically taken in order to prove the “self-love” I have for myself.

Here are the definitions I found for the three most important aspect of this topic.Lack of self-love can lead to low self-esteem which can then lead to us seeking validation.

Regard for one’s own well-being and happiness – Oxford dictionary

Belief and confidence in your own ability and value – Cambridge dictionary 

The action of checking or proving the validity or accuracy of something – Oxford dictionary 

My opinion
In my opinion (please focus on the keyword my opinion), I think it’s associated with lack of self-esteem and possibly seeking validation when we caption an explicit image with self-love because I personally believe self-love is more than physical attributes. 

Also, as cliche as this might sound, nobody knows tomorrow. Let me say that again, nobody knows tomorrow. There’s a possibility that these so-called self-love pictures can end up in your professional settings and this can cost you your job (depending on your career).

It’s disheartening that many people post these explicit images because of the attention and approval they receive from strangers on social media. Why boost your self-esteem for 10 minutes online only for you to cry yourself to sleep at night? Is it really worth it? 

What is self-love to me?
When I think about self-love I see it as a mindset. It’s a mindset that might take you a while to achieve and you can sometimes go off track but once you have self-love it’s easier to go back to that state of mind because it’s already there.

Self-love should be unconditional; regardless of whether you put on a few kilos or you lost a few kilos, whether you got that job you wanted so much and know you deserve or not, whether you’re looking glamorous or not. You accept yourself unconditionally

Just as we love our family and friends unconditionally we should also express the same love towards ourselves.

Stay posted for my next blog where I’ll discuss how I practice self-love.

Please don’t forget to like, comment, share and follow 🙂 

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